Poison

It’s no good
To feel poisoned
And know that you are the poisoner
You want to hit yourself in the gut
But that would just make matters worse
The prescribed recipe is the best remedy
But so much more complicated than it sounds
RELAX, BREATHE DEEPLY, COUNT TO TEN
I don’t know why it’s so hard
But it is

In moments like these
It’s a no win situation
If you move too quickly
In the direction of a door
It seems so dramatic
And will surely make things worse

If you stay where you are
Continuing with what you are doing
Your face may turn to stone
The pressure unbearable
Little icicles in your bloodstream
Will undoubtedly lead to wincing and grimacing
Which will also make matters worse

You can talk about it
It usually helps
But for the first few minutes
It may feel like it’s actually getting worse
That’s the way the poison works
The locking up of your jaw
Is imaginary
As is the blood in your eyes

Some people will argue that tears are curative
Therapeutic in and of themselves
These people are indubitably women
And have no idea what torture it is
To watch a woman cry
For good reason
It can turn a man’s insides out
Twisting and bubbling
Until he breaks down and says,
“I’m sorry”
Over and over again
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6.12.06